The Duchess

The wretched AOL Moviefone has the exclusive new teaser of Keira Knightley's The Duchess.



Hopefully someone will put it on YouTube soon.

I think it looks much better than The Other Boleyn Girl myself. The costumes are to die for, particularly that feathered cavalier hat. And her hair! Maybe Knightley can bring back voluminous curls.

I like Keira Knightley. I really do wish people would stop picking on her about her weight. It shouldn't reflect on her professional work in the slightest, and I think it's appalling it came up so much in reviews of Atonement. I saw her Singapore Pirate outfit on display and while I know it's a lot of layers, it was hardly anorexic sized.

She reminds me of a friend I had who could not, no matter what she did, put on weight. She had to have her shoes custom made because she had no fat or muscle to protect her bones. School was torture for her, people stopped her on the streets urging her to seek help for her anorexia. Whether you are excessively thin or excessively fat, people seem to think it's all right to call you out. It's poor form.

Well, rant over. I think this looks interesting. She has the perfect accent for an ancestor of Princess Diana. I'm looking forward to it, if only for the costumes. And the sex scenes, those look hot too.

And now for something completely different....

Reviews!!

After languishing indoors for most of the fall movie season, I am finally catching up with all the lovely holiday releases...

First up was Atonement which I find myself shrugging off a week later. It IS good--the acting is impeccable, it's beautifully shot, it's elegantly historical and yet the ending is so galling as to just make me despise the entire film. I know that has more to do with the book than the movie, but it is enough to strip the romance from it entirely. Do NOT go looking for a happy ending, or even a bitter sweet ending. It is a kick to the gut, jaw-clencher of a finale.

Keira Knightley seems to be drawing mixed reviews. For every glittering accolade and award nomination, someone else is calling her a talentless anorexic. Personally, I thought she was very good, so subtle as to be easily blown off. She has become polished and mature, miles away from Elizabeth Swann. It's a stark contrast to her doppleganger, Natalie Portman, who still comes off like an uncertain little girl in the majority of her roles (yes, even Closer). I wouldn't have bought Portman in this role, but Knightley carries it off. It's obviously a matter of confidence and comfort.

I still find myself wondering where Romola Garai's early promise went. She's completely blank in this, as she has been in every BBC adaptation. She seems to think just changing from stunningly pretty to dowdy is acting enough.

James MacAvoy is utterly heartbreaking. There must be something in the Scottish water that churns out these men with strong chins and beautiful, tear-filled eyes.

The next night, I caught Blade Runner: The Final Cut. It was stunning. It's a shame Warner Bros. didn't do a wider release as this would have benefited from enormous screens and top notch sound. Seeing it in a small art house theatre simply didn't do it justice. I only wish The Final Cut didn't come with all that "Deckard is a Replicant" baggage. Ridley Scott, leave that kind of garbage to George Lucas.

December 21st found me making a tough call between Sweeney Todd and P.S. I Love You. Not surprisingly, my future husband won out, as did a desire to avoid the unwashed Johnny Depp crowd. I've had my fill of smeared eyeliner on weedy boys and girls, thank you.

I liked it, but I was hoping to love it.

P.S. I Love You suffers from a lack of Butler. I say this not because he's the love of my life, but because he is practically the title character. There needed to be some illness between life and death--perhaps not a deathbed scene, but at least the shock of a diagnosis. (I personally longed for his deathbed scene but I'm a glutton for anguish.) We needed to see him make the travel arrangements for Holly. (A heartwrenching scene in the book.) We needed more letters.

When adapting the book, they needed to make one of two choices: make it the provincial Irish story or relocate it completely. Trying to do both hampered the entire story. Had Ms. Ahern not been the Prime Minster's daughter, they probably would have set it in America.

Ahern's book was also problematic in that the characters were so very young. Butler and Swank are both older and more mature than the original Gerry and Holly, so it seems unlikely that neither would have a decent job or life plan at this point in their lives. In the book, Gerry was a professional of some kind and made good money, this needed to be kept in rather than youthening him via unemployment. It would also have explained Holly's perpetual unemployment, which just seems rather lame in the movie.

No matter how you adapted the book or who you cast, Holly Kennedy was always going to be problematic. Ahern herself is very young, and she always writes heroines who have no real independence. They have no schooling and vague fantasy jobs. Holly had neither, was utterly dependent on Gerry, and has to scramble to make a life for herself. That is never going to be swallowed by a film audience. (Though I know plenty of girls my age who are in precisely the same boat.) Hilary Swank's Holly is a curious blend, managing to be both responsible and helpless. While it's entirely believable that she lost track of herself just trying to make ends meet, she never quite seems lost or poor enough. And giving her a troubled family history just seems unnecessarily cruel. Unlike a lot of reviewers, I think Swank was a solid choice, it was just that her character needed to be tightened up. Holly Kennedy should have been stronger to make her collapse that much more devastating.

I am sounding quite cruel. It's a sweet film, it really is, and I got choked up numerous times. (Variety says this is because I am an emotional cripple. Ah well.) It was mostly because I want to wake up to a Gerry (Butler) of my own, even if that would mean an early death by one of us. (Preferably me, a'la Rachel Weisz.) There are also some very funny moments--I think Butler should make a point of referencing his balls in all his films. And the shots of Ireland are breathtaking. If Sweeney Todd is sold out (or jam-packed with stinky Hot Topic kids), you could do worse than seeing this. Go just for the strip tease.

Now THAT'S how you wear a fedora!

Damn, the Internet is just buzzing with new trailers left and right this week!

Today is Nim's Island, the family action-adventure starring Jodie Foster, Abigail Breslin, and the love of my life, Gerard Butler.

It's being hosted on Yahoo Movies. Watch it. I'm usually skeptical of Walden Media but this looks really fun. Not the least because Gerard Butler wears that Indy outfit through the whole thing.

It makes me want to strap on my Lara Croft gunbelt, lace up my New Rocks and just go on all kinds of sexy adventures with Alex Rover.

I'm way more excited for this than the childhood-destroying Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. Oh yeah, I went there.

More Wall*E, Yet Not Enough

This is a good month for trailers. Wall*E has one too!

WALL-E Exclusive Trailer

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It's beautiful and heart wrenching, just like all the Wall*E footage thus far. I love his little voice. There's more than a little R2-D2 and E.T. in his animation, which makes me love him all the more. He just breaks my heart.

Incidentally, Harry also has posted a recap of the footage premiered at BNAT 9. I'm not alone in sniffling over this little robot, apparently everyone was left in tears after the last clip shown.

There's also a new viral website up for BuyNLarge, the company that runs the world in the future of Wall*E. It's a site full of social snark.

Who started this trend of viral marketing? Was it The Dark Knight? Someone else? It's quite interesting and, I'm sure, will be overplayed in the near future. But it's fun while it lasts.

It put a smile on MY face...

The Dark Knight's official trailer is up at A Taste for the Theatrical. (Be sure to click on the "Download Now" graphic, the Joker's a little vague.)

Go watch it. Geek out majorly. It is seriously the COOLEST trailer I have seen since 300. I've shown it to everyone I know. If I could show it to my dog, I would. (He's a bit too young, I think.)

The Joker hanging out of a police car, blissed out?
Rachel Dawes smacking him up?
"You've got some fight in you...I like that!"

It's the stuff a fanboy or girl's dreams are made of.

I've got to say...I don't think that's lipstick on the Joker's face.

The X-Files: This is a Conspiracy, Right?

I said there were two films. The other is the untitled X-Files movie.

I was convinced I was safe, that it was all David Duchovny's fevered publicity, until they started filming it last week.

Wait--WHAT? Come again? Did I just...oh, there's even photos to prove it. And here I was hoping it was a bad dream.

I loved The X-Files. I owned the books. The posters. The t-shirts. The Scully haircut. I spent hours theorizing with friends and family about What It Was All About. I went as Agent Scully for Halloween--a costume which, I realize now, heralded more elaborate attempts like Queen Gorgo.

In fact, there's a deep dark chapter of my past which involves me, that Scully suit, and a few Trek conventions. Throw in a misadventure with an Imperial Stormtrooper, an appearance in the official X-Files Magazine, and you have one of the geekiest sagas ever created.

But that all ended. My love for it died out completely, as Chris Carter smoked a bunch of weed (probably lit with $100 bills from the merchandising), wrote those last two seasons and then laughed in our faces. Our years of theorizing were wasted as we learned...well...none of us ever did figure it out, except that it SUCKED.

For years, they promised a film. And no one really gave a crap because frankly, Fight the Future was terrible, the beginning of the end. We only pretended it wasn't until it became apparent Carter had no concept of "continuity" or "plot."

The X-Files faded away, a pop culture relic we all wondered if we should feel vaguely embarrassed about. Gillian Anderson vanished into United Kingdom obscurity and Duchovny claimed to be "in talks" every single time he was promoting a project of his own.

And now, just like that, we've got a movie. And a cast that includes Amanda Peet and Xzibit. Because nothing says high class science fiction like Amanda Peet and Xzibit. Remember the days when huge stars lusted after a part on the show?

Apparently, it's a stand alone, monster-of-the-week story...not that they have a choice, they don't remember any of that UFO malarkey either.

It's just...WHY? The show became a blueprint of what NOT to do in a sci-fi show. It comes up every time we wonder if LOST has gone off the rails. Just like with Indy 4, it's like the JJ Abrams and Joss Whedon accolades have been gnawing at the soul of Chris Carter and he's determined to prove he's Still Got It. And I think the answer to "Does he?" lies in the fact that both Abrams and Whedon have never lacked for work or praise. Whedon even managed to get Serenity made, whereas Carter can barely crack the headlines when he begins filming The Untitled X-Files Sequel.


The ship has sailed, leaving the smoldering wreck of the show behind it. Why dig it up? One might argue that it cannot possibly be ruined further, but I think the fact that you went from Robert Patrick to Xzibit says oh yes you can. As one former X-Phile put it, "If they could make a movie to undo the mess of the last two season, ok. But its not and so, who cares?"

And the fact is, I still have good memories of Mulder and Scully. The show might have sucked, the answers may never have come...but they still stayed true. They were still cool. The last thing I want to see is a middle-aged pair of FBI Agents desperately trying to look competent and like nothing with aliens or miracle babies ever happened.

It's just like watching Indy try to ride again. Let heroes retire in peace and stand as examples for new characters and new talent to follow.

Indiana Jones and the Girl Who Cried Please God, No.

There are two movies on the horizon that make my blood boil.

One is Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull.



Wow, Indy. You look younger than in Raiders of the Lost Ark!

Indiana Jones is a franchise I hold near and dear to my heart. I grew up on it. In fact, Raiders was one of the first movies I was ever subjected to, as my mom saw it when she was pregnant with me. It's a famous legend in my family, retold every time we watch the movie. When that boulder came crashing down after Indy--in the new Dolby sound--the entire theatre shook, and my mom reports I did panicked somersaults. They were sure they had killed me or turned me clinically retarded.

Personally, I'll bet my infant self wasn't scared--I was excited and pissed off I couldn't watch it for another five years.

My mom believes it had another effect. She has remarked that clearly, I became a deskchair archaeologist due to this in-utereo dose of Indiana Jones. Last Christmas, after bestowing the DVD set on me, she had a new theory. "Raiders made you what you are," she said. "It gave you all the--I don't know, terminology for what you became."

"A fangirl?"

"Yeah. A fangirl. You and your sister's love of film came from me and your dad, you were born with it. You were raised on movies and we didn't shelter you, we just plopped you in front of more and I figured if you had nightmares from their faces melting, I'd know you were too sensitive for that kind of thing..."

"But it's more than that! Raiders did something to you." And then she burst out laughing. "I really screwed you up! This is where you developed your problems with men. I made you into Marion Ravenwood! And unless Indiana Jones walks through that door, you're screwed!"

"Yeah. Yeah, you're right. Great!"

"Still," she said. "I'd rather you be Marion Ravenwood and be able to clock Indy in the jaw for screwing you over than some a girl who would just take it. I like the way my girls turned out."

Thus, it was no accident I started emulating that other archaeological bad girl, Lara Croft? Why clock Indy when you can shoot him?

I'm certainly not unique in having my entire childhood defined by a bullwhip and a fedora, but I seem to be in the minority of wanting my memory to remain the warm sunset of Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade.

I mean...they rode off into the sunset. What else could you ask for?

A fourth movie, apparently.

I don't want it. I don't want to see Marion Ravenwood as a (possible) single, dumped mother. She's the cool chick in the red lipstick, immaculately Girl Friday, who is sassy enough to comfort Indy with booze. And I refuse to believe she would ever give birth to a stuck-up prat like Shia LeBeouf, or let him run around with Wolverine hair. Indy's son would look like this:




I don't want to see cranky Harrison Ford try to convince me he's still cool enough to be Indiana Jones. He's not. Don't make me drag out Hollywood Homicide to prove it.

Most of all, I don't want to be abused emotionally and spiritually by George Lucas. Let's not forget, he approved the final script. That paragon of writing who brought us Jar Jar Binks picked the script because of a MacGuffin...a term no one has used since what, 1955?

Look, Lucas, it's nothing personal. No wait, it is. You destroyed Star Wars!

And while I still admire Steven Spielberg, the fact is that he hasn't done an adventure flick in years. He brings us drama, not the fantastic, and sees flaws in his early work that makes me cry. I was terribly traumatized by his revamp of E.T. and now, he's threatening to do it again. Plus he's foisting Shia LeBeouf on me. Not cool.

I refuse to have any faith. There is nothing about this project that gives me any hope. Not the plot leaks, not the dapper smiles at San Diego ComicCon, not the cast, and certainly NOT the title. I guess there could be some kickass trailer that will leave me groveling--and I'll eat this post if there is--but frankly...I just don't want this movie. It smacks of Spielberg, Lucas, and Ford proving they still have it, a big "pfft, whatever!" to Peter Jackson, Gore Verbinski and Christopher Nolan--the three directors I feel have inherited the "blockbuster franchise" crown with Lord of the Rings, Pirates of the Caribbean and Batman. And that's still excluding directors like Zack Snyder, Guillermo del Toro, and Alfonso Cuaron who have given us some pretty amazing films in the last year.

Instead, Indy 4 has the whiff of the current fad of trying desperately to revive the big 80's careers. First Stallone, then Willis, now Ford.

Your day is done, boys. Your glory is preserved on DVD. Let the future belong to Johnny Depp, Christian Bale, and Gerard Butler. The world demands new heroes. Indiana Jones is far from passe, but I want to see what other legends are waiting to be made onscreen.

I know the original Indy trilogy will always be there for me, no matter what horrors this fourth film holds. I can still enjoy the original Star Wars trilogy, pretending the prequels were all just a bad dream. But the world will be just a little worse knowing its out there.

The Dark Knight, Part II

The Joker made good on his word. IMAX's showings of "I Am Legend" will carry a 6 minute prologue from The Dark Knight, and anyone wanting a detailed description of said prologue can check it out on Ain't It Cool News. It might be worth waiting to see on the IMAX screen though.

Meanwhile, the Joker made another viral attack. Really smart geeks who found his want ad in The Gotham Times were sent the following:

The story goes a little something like this: people (myself included) who had sent an email to humanresources@whysoserious.com in regard to the job posting printed in The Gotham Times received this email last night,

Quote:
Heads up, clown! Tomorrow means that there's one last shifty step left in the interview process:

Arwoeufgryo


Take one shifty step right on your keyboard and "arwoeufgryo" becomes "steprightup."
At noon EST Tuesday, www.whysoserious.com/steprightup went live, featuring 22 addresses across the U.S. and instructions to pick up a package for "Robin Banks." Turns out all the addresses were bakeries and the packages were cakes with a message written in icing instructing them to call a certain phone number.
Participants who picked up a cake and called the number then found that their cakes were ringing. Digging into the cakes, they found evidence bags containing a cell phone, charger, Joker playing card, and a note. The note told them to call a specific number using the provided cell phone; the number provided a voice message stating "now we know who you are" and queued the site to remove that bakery's address from the running. Cell phone recipients then received a text message from "Joker" saying he'd "call them... eventually."

Once all the cakes had been claimed the teaser poster and screening registration were revealed.

One of these bakeries was here in Denver, which just kills me. Clearly, I lack a criminal mind.

Here's the teaser poster, linked from the Joker's very domain.



The viral campaign has been better scripted than X-Men 3 was. How can the movie be bad?!

The Dark Knight

Sorry about no updates, nothing has really caught my eye lately. And unlike the rest of the world, I haven't been able to enjoy the fall movie season as I am broke.

That said, there has been a rush of action from Gotham City. The world has been graced with the first non-Internet, full-length photo of Heath Ledger as the Joker, courtesy of Empire Magazine. AICN, thanks to a Zoner, provided a scan:



More photos of Batman and the Joker surfaced on a Spanish movie news site, Uruloki. Visit the site for more.



The viral marketing team has also been busy. Not only can you read an issue of The Gotham Times, but the Joker has had his dirty way with it and published The Ha Ha HA Times. (He even took time out of his busy schedule to note his favorite Girl Scout cookies.)

Meanwhile, Harvey Dent is trying his damnedest to keep Gotham City clean and end the reign of corrupt cops. If you have a complaint or tip, he urges you to send it to We Are the Answer. Unfortunately, some good citizens have put their phone number in, only to be threatened by the mob...

That the mob is still alive and thriving in Gotham City, despite the presence of Batman, is attested by Remembering Gina.

You can also check up on interest rates at the Gotham National Bank, though Gotham City Hall is still under construction. If you're taking a trip into the city, consider taking the Gotham City Rail, construction of which was funded by Wayne Industries.

The presence of the Joker is everywhere though, and he's heavily recruiting.

The marketing has been genius. Joker cards littered California comic book stores (with no one remembering quite how they got there) and heralded our first glimpse of him. He's put up endless websites and sent fans on bounty-hunts to take photos of ghetto doorways. He attacked San Diego Comic-Con and left thousands transformed into copycats. An unfortunate hostage was forced to record endless voice mails for the passworded teaser before finally being murdered. And the Joker promised to see us again in December.

And with all that's been going on in Gotham lately, everyone feels certain that we may be getting a full trailer of The Dark Knight this month.

Until then, you can watch the teaser (a definite let down after San Diego) and hear a bit of the Joker at the end.



I can't wait. I'm not a huge Batman fan (my heart belongs to Wolverine), but this promises to be something quite brilliant.

P.S. I Love You: Hottest Ad Campaign of 2007

So, how hot is the ad campaign for P.S. I Love You?



I'd say very hot. When was the last time you saw a romantic comedy poster that implied, you know, actual adult sex.

I mean, seriously--all they've got to do is unzip their jeans. For all we know, they already have! Nice!

I love it. Not just because I'm desperately in love with Butler and thus think all sorts of filthy thoughts while looking at it, but because it's quite mature. I'm sick of seeing sexless love stories. I never thought I would see the day when a movie about Casanova lacked a sex scene.

Let us applaud P.S. I Love You (or at least the marketers at Warner Bros) for taking such a bold step. While it's hardly treading where even The Libertine dared go, it's a start in the right direction. The characters are adults. The audience for this film are adults. Let's show some reality.

Of course, I'm sure I'm giving Warner Bros too much credit and they are simply banking on Butler's infamous ass shot in 300. In which case, it's still pretty smart. He has a nice bum. He burned up the screen with Lena Headey. Maybe Warner Bros is saying "Hey ladies--remember that? This is that guy! He's always doing that!"

(Are you, Mr. Butler? This lady reporter demands to know.)

There's more like them over at the official website, or you can visit one of Butler's numerous fan sites. The chemistry between Swank and Butler is so intense I'm quite surprised they didn't actually hook up off-camera.

Wall*E

IGN has the latest poster of the cutest thing since E.T.

I cannot WAIT for this movie. Andrew Stanton was behind the lens of my favorite PIXAR film, Finding Nemo, and I expect this to be even more charming.

The Other Boleyn Girl

The trailer for The Other Boleyn Girl is out and don't bother watching it on Moviefone, it doesn't work. Thank goodness for YouTube.



It's Hollywood's latest take on those crazy Tudors, who have been seeing an incredible glut of television series and movies. I think Elizabeth I is still in the lead, but her dad is catching up.

It's rather frustrating to watch as an amateur historian, as there are plenty of fascinating medieval personages just screaming for the movie treatment. How about Eleanor of Aquitaine? Queen Isabella, She Wolf of France? Stephen and Matilda? Aethelflaed, Lady of Mercia, or the War of the Roses? There's plenty of sex, bloodshed and drama outside of the Tudors. HBO's Rome figured that out, why hasn't anyone else?

But no. We get the Tudors. Again. One longs for someone to focus on someone other than Anne Boleyn--Jane Seymour wants to know where her movie is. A movie about her would make a chilling counterpoint, as she was literally packing her bags and preparing her wedding clothes as the cannons rang out Anne Boleyn's death.

I do blame Philippa Gregory for this, as it was her hugely successful book (which this film is based on) which led to dozens of imitators, who all forgot Henry VIII had four other wives after. And she herself has only danced around the Bolyens and Catherine of Aragon for her other novels.

But what of the trailer?

I suppose I'm being extra snarky here because I couldn't click on it fast enough, and sat there in girly delight--oh the gabled hoods! The gorgeous dresses! OMG ERIC BANA SHIRTLESS!

The cast of "The Other Boleyn Girl" is certainly top-notch and the production values look splendid. The costumes are more accurate than anything "The Tudors" has trotted out--it does my costume geek heart glad to see Anne sporting the gabled hood she made fashionable. The accents, however, are sketchy. That's especially surprising in Bana, given that he is Australian and should be better at Shakespearean English.

Eric Bana is both a delight and a problem in this role. He's far closer to the athletic and attractive Henry who looked good in his tight stockings than Showtime's bony Jonathan Rhys Meyers. But he doesn't have red hair! Hollywood is so desperate for a sexy Henry VIII that they constantly make him a brunette. Would it kill the make-up team to add some color? If anyone can be a sexy redhead, it is Eric Bana. (The onscreen pairing of Bana and Portman, who *does* have the right coloring for Boleyn, will make a red-haired daughter quite mysterious. Maybe that's how the charges of adultery get worked in!)

I find it no end of amusing that Natalie "I won't do nudity" Portman and Scarlett "when do I take my clothes off" Johannson are playing the tart and the prude, respectively. In reality, Mary Boleyn was such a whore, she was sent home from the French court. That's probably the version Johannson thought she was signing up for.
Of course, the double irony is that I've never understood the Johannson hype and rather think she looks the part of a shrinking wallflower.

It goes without saying that The Other Boleyn Girl will bear only a passing resemblance to the actual history. Again, what I find perplexing about the Tudor craze is that everyone is obsessed with rewriting it, when the truth is raunchy and bloody enough on its own. I'm waiting for a version where a lady-in-waiting is beheaded in Anne's place, and she lives in quiet, anonymous solitude. Maybe it will be this one.

Despite my annoyance at everything surrounding it, I am a sucker for a corset piece, and will be seeing this. I don't expect it to be very good. I doubt even the sex scene between Bana and Johannson will be worth it--probably nothing more than the trailer's five seconds of candle-lit shoulders and hands.

The Golden Compass

The final trailer for The Golden Compass is out now and I am getting worried.

Teaser #1 had me skeptical. Trailer #1 had me convinced it was going to be really good. And now I'm right back to being skeptical again which probably means I am going to be hugely disappointed.

I love the casting of Nicole Kidman, despite that she should have dark hair. I still loathe the choice of Daniel Craig as Azreal. Every trailer and production still makes him look like a nerdy professor of Milton rather than the sort of man who can raise an army against God. I always envisioned someone like James Purefoy or Viggo Mortensen in the role--dark, sexy, scary and commanding. If it had been made about ten years ago, I would have picked Alan Rickman. Just because a man is Bond does not make him a rebel against God and it was simply cheap casting due to the success of Casino Royale.



I love Eva Green as Serefina though and Sam Elliott is the PERFECT Lee. If they actually get all the way to "The Amber Spyglass," I'm going to be crying buckets.

But this is all incidental and unrelated to this final trailer. What sends my alarm bells going is Lyra. Where's the girl who enchants the Gyptians, commands a bear, climbs the roofs of Oxford and is so determined to find Roger that she takes on the entire church? In the trailer, we get a girl who gapes blankly every other scene and offers a "Wot's it for?" when offered the Golden Compass. There's no spark, no mischief. The wild child who terrorized Oxford is now prettily dressed and stands around waiting to be led by all the other characters.

I'm apparently not the only one who sees it. Lyra has been entirely cut from the television ad campaign, making the movie look like a fantasy battle solely between Kidman and Craig. That's pretty odd given Lyra is the main character AND the main audience for this film will be children and young adults. You want to entice them with a character their own age...don't you? Unless that character has now become such a blank cipher that you have to try and lure them in with CGI. (I highly doubt that the tv campaign is trying to entice adults, as it is still too glittery to appeal to any adult who hasn't read the book.)

In addition, the CGI also looks absolutely rank. I kept giving it a pass "It's only the trailer, they'll be tweaking it until the release date." But it's NOT getting any better. Iorek the bear looks exactly the same as he did in the earliest test footage. The daemons look like something from Shrek or the wretched Beowulf. This is not the sort of computer animation we should see in a post-LOTR world.

I'll still be lining up to see this in December, but I'm going in with absolutely no expectations.

Disagree? Leave me a comment...

P2

Summit Entertainment has sent me loads of goodies to promote their new thriller (and first major film release) P2. It opened on November 9th to a mass of good reviews.

I've had a fear of parking garages ever since Witness and I don't think this film will help matters any.

I wonder if Wes Bentley ever gets dates anymore? He certainly won't get anyone to ever attend his Christmas party after this!

The trailer is well done, with holiday music never sounding so spooky. It looks like a tart alternative to the fluffy Fred Claus fare.

What follows is the official press release, trailer, and a few stills from the film.


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“Swift and stealthy. Taking the bus to work suddenly seems like a very good idea.”
- The New York Times, Jeannette Catsoulis

“One of the scariest movies of the year! ‘P2' does to parking garages what ‘Psycho' did to taking a shower and what ‘Jaws' did to swimming in the ocean.”
- FOX-TV, Shawn Edwards

“GIRL-POWER revenge story not often seen on screen.”
- US WEEKLY, Jeffrey Epstein

“A thriller that actually thrills.” - AIN'T IT COOL NEWS, Moriarty

“Slasher ‘P2” finds new level of horror.”
- CHICAGO SUN-TIMES, Roger Ebert




It's Christmas Eve. Angela Bridges (Rachel Nichols- “Alias” and CHARLIE WILSON'S WAR), an ambitious young executive, works late before she leaves for her family's holiday party. When she gets down to the parking garage, she discovers that her car won't start. The garage is deserted and her cell phone doesn't get a signal underground.




When Thomas (Wes Bentley- AMERICAN BEAUTY), a friendly security guard, comes along and offers to help, Angela nervously accepts his gesture of good will. Soon after a failed attempt to start her car, he invites her to stay and share a small Christmas dinner he's preparing in the parking office, but she laughs it off. Angela doesn't realize this is no laughing matter – Thomas has been watching her closely...for months. His dinner invitation is not optional.

If Angela wants to live to see Christmas morning, she must find a way to escape from level P2 of the parking garage.



This is the backdrop for Summit Entertainment's new thriller “P2,” a suspenseful nail-biter exploring the fears of being trapped in a dark place and stalked by an obsessed voyeur. In the vein of suspenseful cat-and-mouse thrillers such as WAIT UNTIL DARK, “P2” takes the fear of the underground to a whole new level.

Under the direction of Franck Khalfoun, this taut suspense thriller combines the creative team of producer Alexandre Aja (THE HILLS HAVE EYES - writer/director), Gregory Levasseur (HIGH TENSION - writer), Patrick Wachsberger (MR. AND MRS. SMITH - producer) and executive producers Bob Hayward, David Garrett, and Alix Taylor.





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Welcome!!

Well, the title is lame and thus something I will be saddled with until the end of time. But since every chick with a laptop has claimed a variation of Femme Fatale or Movie Chick for her film blog, I shall be Movie Raider. It pays homage to Raiders of the Lost Ark and my heroine of choice, Lara Croft.

Seeing as I've been unceremoniously chucked from the writing staff of Film Ick, this shall be where I post my reviews, rants, all promotional materials e-mailed to me, and probably whatever Gerard Butler news catches my eye.

If you have a film you wish to promote, feel free to e-mail it to me. I'm not picky and I'll post anything.

Meanwhile, you can check out my past reviews here:

Black Book

Black Snake Moan

For and Against Zack Snyder's 300

Lady Sheridan Goes Down on 300

Darkon

Zzyzx

Top 8 Films of 2006

Donovan Slacks

Ghost House Shorts

The Making of a Martyr

Howard Stern's Fartman

That Thing You Do! Re-Release

300 DVD Release

Beowulf Trailer

And find out more about my personal life on my original blog, Ring Bright and Distinguished of Mind which will be updated alongside this one.